Dream Big; Reach for the Sky; Dream, Believe, Achieve; You Can Do Anything You Put Your Mind To and Other Pointless Quotes

Goals.

They are important right?  I mean if you are on Facebook or Instagram you get the idea of working towards your goals, knowing what your goal is, never losing sight of your goals thrust in your face daily.

I include me in that by the way.

I really do believe that having a goal that you really care about drastically increases your chances of adhering to your plans.  A goal is good, but it has to be one you are passionate about and that holds a genuine meaning for you so that it acts as your motivation.

Equally, saying to people don’t aim high, don’t set big goals would be limiting.  It’s cheesy to say if a goal doesn’t scare you it isn’t big enough but there’s something to be said for aiming higher than you currently think you can reach, thinking big if you like to encourage you to progress.

But we need to be entirely honest.  Not all goals are achievable.

So whilst you should aim big, you should also be realistic.

Let’s say you want a BMI under 25.  According to the NHS 25 or above is overweight.  So perhaps that’s your goal.  On paper that sounds reasonable, a healthy goal.  Is it realistic?  For me, not massively.

I’m 5 foot 11.  To have a BMI of a healthy range I should apparently weigh 140-170lbs (10 stone to 12 stone 1lb).  I actually weigh 13 stone 7lbs at present.  I’m not overweight, I’m not fat.  But to reach what at first sounds like a very reasonable goal I’d need to lose a minimum of 1 1/2 stone, that’s a lot given i’m not actually unhealthy or overweight at the moment.  I weighed 10 stone a few years ago for a while.  I sort of had had that lolipop look and could only maintain it by eating very little and exercising a lot.  It wasn’t in any way enjoyable or sustainable.

So for me a BMI of 25 or less might sounds reasonable but it isn’t really realistic.  To do what I do for a job, to train a I enjoy training and to keep as busy as I do I need fuel.  Naturally i sit around my current weight, happily, without restriction, with chocolate and alcohol.  So that reasonable sounding goal isn’t actually realistic.

You need to make a goal work for you. So it needs to be personal yes, it’s good for it to be big sometimes, but it also needs to be achievable or it serves about as much benefit as not having  goal – in fact probably less because it could have a negative effect on you if it makes you feel like you’ve failed.

Sometimes we can ignore the Social Media motivational quotes and be safe, boring and sensible with our goals and still get results.

Working as a team when your self employed

A few weeks ago a friend (a fellow instructor) said of me and another instructor (a mutual friend) “it’s nice you work together”.  This was in response to us arranging coffee mornings at the gym where we both teach the majority of our classes.

To be honest, doing this as a team was never in question when we had the idea- we’ve always worked as a team with ideas (technique sessions, communicating with the gym etc.) because at the end of the day, we both want the same results, want to do the best for our class members and the gym and know that working together makes that more achievable.  In fact, the same is said for all of the class instructors at the gym in question – we support each others Social Media posts, communicate and look to work as one where we can.  It’s beneficial to us, in a job that can be quite isolating we have support.  It’s beneficial to our members, who know we are all working towards one goal of providing the best experience we can.

I know, from stories and from Facebook groups, this isn’t the case everywhere.  For every team that works as a team there seems to be people that sometimes seem to go out of their way to outdo others.  You hear bonkers stories of instructors encouraging people to not turn up to the cover instructors class when they’re on holiday, or to complain about another instructor or that get upset when a member says they also like the classes of someone else too.

I’m thankful that they are stories for me, in my time teaching I’ve met amazing instructors who helped me, advised me, taught me things and haven’t ever been like that.  I’ve never turned up to cover and found a hostile class, those I’ve covered for are more likely to have told the class to be nice or that they’ll enjoy my class.  I always big up cover that the class might not have met before, I’ve left aux leads and batteries and stereo instructions stashed away for people attending the studio for the first time as my cover.  It’s in my interest for my class to like the cover and them to enjoy teaching the class – it makes finding cover easier!

Let’s face it-  we all get it wrong sometimes and it’s hard to never feel competitive or compare ourselves to others, but generally, and especially as I have gained experience, I’ve realised more and more, the benefit of us fitness professionals working with each other rather than against each other.

I would class myself as a decent instructor.  I’m comfortable enough to know there are some things that the instructors I work with are better at that I am, I know there are things I’m strong at and things I’m less strong at.  We all have strengths and weaknesses, and beyond that we all have different approaches and styles of teaching.  By working as a unit we provide variety (if you don’t like my teaching style they’ll be other instructors who’s classes suit you better and vice versa, what we care about is you find the classes you do enjoy – in reality most people come to all our classes and like the fact that we offer a different experience which keeps things interesting), we can plug each others gaps – refer people to one another if we think someone else would be able to answer a question more effectively.

Will there be fewer classes when we return? We really don’t know at this stage.  The industry as a whole will take time to build back to full capacity.  We don’t yet know whether the timetable for us will be as before straight away or gradually built up over time.  We don’t know whether we will get all our classes back yet.  What we haven’t done is decide to look out for ourselves in a bid to make sure we are the one to get our classes back if some do need to be dropped.

We’ve agreed this is an opportunity.  We’ve stayed connected with class members throughout in different ways.  We have ideas of how we can help the gym promote classes when we return, we’ve been fortunate in that the gym has stayed in touch (and furloughed us) even if they can’t provide certainty on classes right now, and we know there’s an opportunity to build on connections built in lockdown and be an asset to the gym (another thing we sometimes forget when trying to argue or worth – we need to be able to show the gym why we are worth what we’re asking for, be that in monetary terms or what classes we get).  There are no certainties right now of course, but it feels like this is a much better approach than competing with one another for classes.

And in fitness overall this perhaps the attitude we need to take in general. Of course we are technically competing with others for clients, for classes, but we are equally all different and offering different services, so some clients will be suited to us, others better suited for someone else.  Away from the gym I teach most of my classes at I am also involved with lots of other group fitness instructors as part of Jump 4.2 and with a group of other fit pros on a Business Mastermind.  Again these are environments where even though the majority of the group (or all the group in the case of the Mastermind) are fitness instructors competition is replaced by support, being able to ask questions or put forward ideas and get honest feedback without worrying about sounding silly.  In recent months I’ve seen so many fitness professionals do amazing things with the encouragement of their peers, which shows why working with rather than against each other could give the self employed fitness professionals a bigger chance to flourish than just focusing on outdoing our closest ‘rivals’ for classes ever will.

Things all Les Mills Instructors Know – Covid -19 Special

Being a fitness instructor has changed.  Here’s a brief guide to being a Les Mills instructor in the new Covid-19 world.

  1. How do I work Zoom has replaced what is the number for the office as the most commonly asked question on all instructor pages.
  2. Nobody knows what release we are now on for any programme.  Some instructors opted to skip a release, some did not and Les Mills United will be a release in between the numbers we don’t know anyway anymore.  Nobody has asked if we will have to pay for it.  I’m quite surprised by that.
  3. Launches and what to launch are still a hot topic even though we quite clearly won’t be able to do a traditional launch for a while yet.
  4. I’m still slightly surprised nobody has asked what the best trainers for training on carpet are yet.
  5. If instructor led Zoom classes prove anything it’s that virtual is not yet ready to replace live classes.
  6. Either all instructors have very tidy homes or people did a lot of cleaning at the start of Lockdown.
  7. We are willing to pay A LOT for barbells.
  8. Could you teach in a facemask has replaced dumbbells in Body Pump as the most controversial debate.
  9. Largely because it’s ok to use Dumbbells in Body Pump now… Glen said… only took a worldwide pandemic to sort that out.
  10. We are all thinking about teaching in the rain, because we live in the UK and it’s summer time, so obviously it’s going to rain every time we teach outside.

Permission To Eat

How many times have you not eaten a meal or snack because you ate too much the day before or because you haven’t trained today or you’ve been really lazy?

So you skip a meal or eat the lowest calorie thing you can find to compensate.

Then later, when you’re either really hungry because you’ve not eaten or you really want to eat certain foods because you now feel bad and want comfort food, you eat all the foods you enjoy but which also make you feel bad because they are ‘naughty’.

Then the next day the cycle begins again.

Or you are sticking really closely to a low calorie diet and creating a 500 calorie a day deficit.  You do this for 30 days creating a 15,000 calorie deficit.  But it’s hard to stick to, you always crave your favourite foods.  You get to a weekend away, and you’ve been so so good recently so you think what the hell and eat anything and everything all weekend.  Now you have 5,000 calories a day for 3 days, which is the same amount of calories that you just spent a month creating a deficit of.

You’ve deprived yourself so much that you feel you have to have a blow out and the blow out almost cancels out the progress.

Both of those situations are linked to how we view food; good and bad foods, naughty foods, how we deserve or don’t deserve food, how some foods should be avoided or we need to earn higher calories foods.

The problem with thinking about and labeling food in this way is your emotions affect what you eat and what you eat affects how you feel.

In other words we need to not feel guilt when we eat certain foods or certain amounts and accept that food is something that we use for energy.  We can enjoy it and should enjoy it and yes, depending on the situation, we do also need to be aware of calorie values and how much or little we consume.

However labeling food does not help us, equally telling ourselves we much do a certain amount of activity to earn food is also damaging to our own self worth.

You need to eat a base number of calories every day for energy even if you stay in bed all day.  Telling yourself you do not deserve to eat certain foods because you’ve not trained much is equally as bad for your own self worth as feeling bad about eating certain foods.

In finding a way of eating and training that you enjoy and is sustainable removes the guilt and the urges to binge and allows you to feel happy with your diet and nutrition routine.

We need to give ourselves unconditional permission to eat.

 

 

 

 

Knowledge doesn’t equal application

Knowledge doesn’t equal application.

Several times over lockdown myself and my friend Jane have said to each other, why are we so much better at giving each other advice that dealing with the same situation ourselves?  It’s because when we look at other people’s problems we can approach them with a certain degree of dispassion that allows us to offer practical advice.  When we try and apply it to ourselves our emotions challenge the logic of said advice making it harder for us to follow.

Having knowledge on something is good, generally if you are approaching a situation you want to have at least a basic amount of knowledge.  Yet knowledge doesn’t take into account the surrounding factors which can cause complications and challenge even what we know to be correct.

So why is it important to acknowledge this?

By now if you read my blogs regularly you know how to lose weight.  You’ve heard the words calorie deficit many times.  Knowing a calorie deficit is required doesn’t make it easy to lose weight.  Exercise has lots of health benefits.  That knowledge doesn’t in turn make getting started with exercise easy.

Don’t get me wrong- knowledge is important.  Understanding why you are doing things and how they work is vital in making sustained changes.  But knowing in itself if only the first step.  You need to actually apply the knowledge for it to work.  It’s a bit like buying a load of lovely new gym kit.  That can be a great first step to getting yourself moving, but it is only beneficial if you do actually put it on and move.

So how do you get to the application stage?  I believe there are several points you need to reach:

  1. You need to have a reason, something that you feel strongly enough that it provides the motivation for you to start making changes.  For some people this might be push factors – the doctor says you must lose weight for your health or you must lower your blood pressure, other times it could be pull factors – a dress you’d like to fit into, you want to run a 10km.  Having a focus or goal can motivate you to apply your knowledge.
  2. You need to care about your reason.  Ever tried to do something that you didn’t really care about well?  It rarely turns out well, we need to care about what we are working towards – when you do something to please someone else or becasue you’re made to sticking to it becomes so much harder.
  3. You need to have a plan.  You’ve contemplated taking action enough to formulate a goal, a reason to make a change.  Now you need to plan how that change will be effective.  There’s rarely just one thing you can do to work towards a goal, yet sometimes the problem with having knowledge is it can be overwhelming in deciding what you should do.  Trying to do too much at once can be detrimental, so creating an action plan helps you implement knowledge with confidence.
  4. You need to have support to action your plan.  Maybe that’ a coach / PT – someone who can provide more direction and accountability, or perhaps it’s recruiting people around you to motivate you and hold you to account.
  5. You need to know progress isn’t linear.  You won’t see progress and change every week.  You won’t hit every target when you want to or expect to.  You will have weeks where you feel like you are going backwards.  That’s ok.
  6. You need to be flexible.  You might need to tweak or change your plan.  Knowing what you need to do and having a plan doesn’t mean than things can’t change- you might shift your own goal once you get started or you might find something isn’t quite working.  Flexibility will allow you a greater chance of creating change.
  7. You need to understand your own mindset.  If you accept that knowledge doesn’t equal application it’ also easy to understand that wanting to reach a goal doesn’t mean you will never sabotage yourself.  Understanding that you will have relapses, set backs and things won’t even go to plan but that doesn’t mean you are back to square one will help keep you on track.

If you’ve ever beaten yourself up because you aren’t where you want to be even though you know what you should be doing to get there stop.

Knowing and doing aren’t the same thing. Knowing is desirable.  Applying knowledge is a whole other skill set.

 

Diets DO Work

How many times have you heard the phrase diets don’t work?

I’ll be honest I’ve said this myself so many times.

Then last year I went to Martin MacDonald’s Nutrition Tour and he said something that turned my thinking on this totally on it’s head.  I’ll have to paraphrase because I don’t have the exact quote.

Diets do work, weight maintenance is what people fail at.

When we say diets don’t work, as fitness professionals we are saying it from a good place ,as a way of trying to protect clients, but it isn’t actually what we mean.  It’s a simplified statement to generalise what we mean.

Because the fact is diets do work.  Or at least they can if you follow them.

Firstly let me clarify here when we talk diet we generally mean a way of losing weight.  I’ve said previously in it’s most accurate term your diet is whatever you happen to eat, but as a society we hear diet and we think weigh loss effort.  That is how I’m going to use the word today.

I’ve also said before all diets, no matter how they are dressed up, work by creating a calories deficit in some way.  If you create a calorie deficit you will lose weight.  Some ways are healthier than others. Some ways are more likely to promote unhealthy relationships with food than others.  Some ways provide more education as to how you are losing weight than others and some pedal myths that you are in fact losing weight because of a pill or a shake or your food combinations instead of calorie control.  But, the fact remains you burn more calories than you consume you create weight loss.

Therefore diets do work.

I can say oohhh don’t do Herbal Life, Weight Watchers, Slimming World or whatever diet you want to put in place of that, but fundamentally if you do them and follow them you will lose weight.  It would be wrong of me to lie and say that is not the case.

So why do I and so many people say you shouldn’t follow a diet when they do work?

Because what we really mean when we say that diets don’t work is that diets, as opposed to educated lifestyle changes, work whilst you follow them.  When you stop following them and go back to previous eating habits they will stop working, and the issue with diets is that they are very often not sustainable in the long term or if they are sustainable they tie you into contracts with that brand.

Some diets are restrictive.  Anything very low calorie or which cuts out certain foods for no other reason than weight loss is hard to maintain forever.  Especially once you have lost the weight and the scale coming down every week no longer exists as motivation.  I’ll tell you from experience no matter how much you believe staying at your ideal weight will be motivation enough it really isn’t.  Therefore very restrictive diets are difficult to maintain long term and so if you don’t have the knowledge and acquired skills on how to maintain weight once you reach your goal it is the maintenance part you may struggle with, and this is often why we see people yoyo diet.

Other diets are certainly less restrictive and I do see that there is honestly no reason why once ready to maintain weight you could not continue with them.  The issue with these is they very often tie you into a product.  Weigh in groups for instance (Slimming World, Weight Watchers and so on).  You could continue to attend these and eat in this way quite comfortably to maintain but you must continue to buy into the method because there is a lack of education included to allow you to go alone.

Equally things like Herbal Life, these can be promoted by PTs who also provide education around nutrition.  But they integrate their products into that education, so you believe you not only need a protein shake and a herbal tea and a pre workout and a meal replacement shake to lose then maintain weight, but you need that particular brand.  I believe that psychologically if we have succeeded in losing weight on those products we will believe even more so that they are important to remaining on track.  This essentially means to maintain weight loss you are tied into a product for however long you maintain.  If you suddenly can’t afford that product, mentally it is a lot easier to then lose that maintenance.

So when a PT says diets don’t work what we really mean is the diet phase is really not that important in the grand scheme of things.

You want to lose 3 stone.  You think that that is the hard part and then keeping it off will be easy.  Nope, at 1lb a week allowing a few weeks where you lose nothing you can comfortably lose 3 stone in a year (less if you are very focused but actually you don’t want to be obsessed with losing weight).  Say you are 25 and live to 98, that is 1 year of weight loss and then another 72 keeping that weight off.  If you are successful at this the majority of your life is in the maintenance phase not the diet phase (obviously not taking into account life changes etc).

So when we say don’t diet, we mean diet if you wish to lose weight, but don’t follow a fad.  Learn about calories, get a coach,  not a diet plan (PTs can provide advice and education not diet plans unless they are qualified nutritionists), get an idea of how much energy you need to eat.  Then eat that food in a way that suits your lifestyle (by the way that could be paleo, via fasting or another method if you are also aware of your calorie consumption).  If you do that once you hit your goal you adjust your calories slightly and just continue as you were.  The key here is all the time you have eaten normally, in a way that really suits you – not in a special magical way that has helped you lose weight but requires a lot of thought every day / week or a lot of money.  The key is you’ll know why you lost weight and don’t attribute it to magical speed foods (yes Slimming World I’m looking at you) or a magical pill (there might well be a product out there you love that makes you feel great and that’s cool, use it, feel great but all the while know that product is not the reason for your weight loss).

A decent PT knows if they do their job well you won’t need them forever – if they try and make you reliant on them forever they pretty much just want your money.  We might retain clients for a long time because they feel the benefit of our support or thrive from the accountability, valid reasons to see a coach, but we want clients to understand where their results come from – not to mystify them so they remained chained to us.  Whether you chose to continue working with a coach or not you should be given the skills that if you went it alone you have knowledge and are empowered to do so.

Diets do work.  We struggle with maintenance.  That’s why dieting in a sustainable and suitable way paves the way to a greater chance of success with maintenance, and if you are currently dieting or thinking about starting a weight loss journey know both that and this.  Weight loss isn’t what you want.  What you want is to be able to maintain that once you reach the goal.  You don’t want it to be a short term thing so don’t look at short term options.

 

You Can’t Take Likes To the Bank

Blog 10 of my mini series…

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At the end of February (feels like a life time ago now) I traveled to Belfast to attend the Only Just media Summit.  This was just as Corona Virus was starting to become a ‘thing’, before Social Distancing had become a ‘thing’ and the week that Northern Ireland had just had their first case.

The event was a full day of speakers, all experts in their fields, talking to a room full of bloggers, Vloggers, content creators and brands.  My plan immediately after the event was to write some blogs on the speakers and my key takeouts.  Life then got in the way, CoronaVirus exploded and took up all my time at work and this idea got left in the notes section of my phone.  Until now.

Today is the final blog where I want to outline my key take outs for the day.

Why?  To be honest it’s probably multipurpose (like that kind of cleaning product you but to clean the kitchen and bathroom if like me you are not a ‘Mrs. Hincher’.  Partly I think it will help me solidify the key points I took away from the day, because although I’ve not written about them here until now I have started to take action.  But also because I think you as the reader could also benefit from these takeouts.  You might not be interested in branding or social media or content creation but some of the ideas I took away could just be useful for your approach to your job or you life in general.

So introductions over today’s blog will focus on the talk given by Alan Wallace, an account brand and project manager from Northern Ireland.

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‘You can’t take likes to the bank’ said Allan.

How many likes your photos on Instagram get or how many shares are not a metric to bank on.

I think whether you use your social media accounts for personal reasons, for business or both this can be easy to forget.

It’s easy to see someone else getting hundreds of likes or shares and compare yourself to them and wonder what you are doing wrong.

After writing nine previous blogs about social media in this series, how you can use it to aid your own personal brand (regardless whether you use that brand as part of a business or just for you) it feels right to finish on that thought, and it felt a good way for the summit itself to end.

A reminder that when we post content we want the content to matter to us and be true to our own personal beliefs and values.  When it is, if it doesn’t get the kind of traction we had hoped we can still feel good about the content because we know it’s worthwhile.

Why do people doubt the energy balance equation?

As a PT and group fitness instructor I frequently talk about the Energy Balance Equation.  How if you want to lose weight you must have more energy going out than in, if you want to gain weight it’s the opposite and to maintain you want them to be about equal.

It’s essentially the base of any nutrition knowledge, and the first thing anyone needs to get to grips with if they want to work on their nutrition.

Macros, meal timings, supplements.  They all have a place sure, but if you haven’t got your calories in v calories out in the right place what time you eat dinner, the amount of protein or fat you eat or whether you take BCAAs or won’t make much difference to your success.

Equally, people will say I had massive success with this way of eating / this method / this diet, and essentially behind each of these methods the fundamental reason for success is the individual found a way of controlling their calories in v. out that was appropriate to their goals and which suited their lifestyle.  It can be dressed up in many different ways but that fundamental lies behind every successful method of actively managing food intake.

So why are we so reluctant to believe this?

Almost universally, at some point of another, most people have chosen to believe that either the reason they are not reaching their goals or are reaching their weight management goals is something beyond calories.

No again, I’m not saying that other factors cannot help refine a diet.  If you are managing your energy balance well the types of food you get your energy from, when you eat, extra supplements can help you improve energy levels and performance.  They do this however building upon the foundation that is you eating the right amount of food for your gapl each day.

If you are over eating by 1,000 calories every day whether you eat those calories at 6 am or 6 pm makes no difference.  Whether the calories come from avacado and lettuce or Nutella on biscuits makes no difference.  Your body shape makes no difference, your genetic make up makes no difference.  You are eating too many calories for your goal.  Energy in v. energy out is like gravity- it’s a fact.

So why do we self sabotage on this so often?  Because actually, when it’s this simple, we all have the ability to successful manage our food intake in line with our goals.

I think  it comes down to two main reasons:

Firstly, people selling their ideas means that very often the calories truth is hidden behind a gimmik.

We buy into products or brands or books and theories that promise us results.  In order for those brands to stand out and or you to go to them specifically they need to have a selling point- the thing that makes their methods work.

For that they need to sell you lots of reasons beyond calories as to why their methods work.  You do their diet, you lose weight or gain weight and so accept that those methods must be the reason.  But behind all of these diets there is still always the energy balance equation, and whilst other factors can also provide benefit you still need that energy balance to be right.  What these brands don’t do is actively promote calories as the key.  They let is silently do the work in the background and let their ‘unique selling point’ take the credit.  Essentially they are like a really bad boss taking credit for what their team does as the ground work!

The second factor is our own emotional response.  It’s so much easier for us to think if i can get this one really sexy aspect of my diet right everything else will fall into place.  Why else do diet pills appeal to people – you take this one pill, make no other changes and you’ll see results.  We like that idea.  If I add this supplement that will make the difference.  Because accepting that actually we aren’t eating enough or are eating too much means we need to actually work and make real changes to what we eat.

We also often tend to over estimate (for people looking to gain weight) or under estimate (for people looking to lose weight) how much we eat in terns of calories I find.  That’s why tracking, whilst unsexy compared to intuitive eating, is useful.  Again though it’s harder work and seems very old school and boring next to I eat what my body tells me it wants.  Now i’m not saying doing that is a bad thing – but you have to know how to listen to your body to do that, and if you aren’t already getting the results you want I’d suggest you don’t yet know how to listen to your body.  The way to learn is unfortunately the very boring learn about calories in v. out until you find the right balance for you – once you’ve grasped that eating intuitively and not tracking becomes very possible because you do then have a better idea of your energy (by which I mean calories) levels.

We all want to think we are different.  That calories might be your issue but mine is my metabolism, mine is how I react to certain foods, my blood type and so on.  It might be to a certain degree – but that thing is in reality going to be such a small factor in comparison to your energy in v. out.  So for many of us is our issue is we are focusing on something that makes a 1% difference to our diet instead of focusing on something that can have a massive difference.  We then assume that because we aren’t seeing our desired results we need to delve even deeper into our biology and chemical makeup to see results.

The best way to get results is to stop bullshitting yourself.

Workout what you burn.

Workout what you consume.

Change those to get the result you want.

It’s boring.  It’s simple.

That’s why we always look for other answers.  We assume it’s so boring and simple and obvious it cannot be the key.

We literally cannot see the wood for the trees.

Golden Handcuffs

Blog 9 of my mini series…

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At the end of February (feels like a life time ago now) I traveled to Belfast to attend the Only Just media Summit.  This was just as Corona Virus was starting to become a ‘thing’, before Social Distancing had become a ‘thing’ and the week that Northern Ireland had just had their first case.

The event was a full day of speakers, all experts in their fields, talking to a room full of bloggers, Vloggers, content creators and brands.  My plan immediately after the event was to write some blogs on the speakers and my key takeouts.  Life then got in the way, CoronaVirus exploded and took up all my time at work and this idea got left in the notes section of my phone.  Until now.

Today is the blog nine of ten where I want to outline my key take outs for the day.

Why?  To be honest it’s probably multipurpose (like that kind of cleaning product you but to clean the kitchen and bathroom if like me you are not a ‘Mrs. Hincher’.  Partly I think it will help me solidify the key points I took away from the day, because although I’ve not written about them here until now I have started to take action.  But also because I think you as the reader could also benefit from these takeouts.  You might not be interested in branding or social media or content creation but some of the ideas I took away could just be useful for your approach to your job or you life in general.

So introductions over today’s blog will focus on the talk given by Tyler Babin, creative resident at Adobe and former creative for Gary Vee.

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Among other things Tyler talked about how being happy is strategically better than making a strategic decision for financial gain.

When you are looking to make changes in your career, whether you be self employed or employed it can be easy to look at the route that will offer the most money in the least amount of time.

But Tyler talked of this being like ‘golden handcuffs’ in that you get material value from this route but it can be detrimental to your mental health and your happiness.

It can sometimes therefore be better to look towards opportunities that align with your values and benefit your life in a more rounded way and work towards monetary goals this way instead.  Whilst undoubtedly taking longer, you are more likely to enjoy what you do during this period or growth and so get more personal value from it and be happier in general.  This in turn can make you more willing to put the work in to reach your ultimate goals.

I think this is an important idea to remember, we live in a society where we are used to getting things instantly and encouraged to attain high salaries and buy a lot of material things.  In tandem to this however we also live in a society where mental health problems are common and many people report being dissatisfied with their work life balance.

Therefore taking  a step back and deciding what works best for you, rather than what on appear looks like the best option, could make you happier in the long run.  Of all the messages from this Summit I think this is one of the most powerful.

 

 

Mental Health Awareness Week Post

I haven’t written a blog post in two weeks.  To be honest up until yesterday I’d also not done a podcast for two weeks.  I’ve worked (many many hours overtime) and I’ve done what I needed to do and I’ve trained a bit but apart from that I’ve really not done much.

I’ve found lockdown hard, I live alone and I’m used to be being very active, very busy and seeing lots and lots of people every day.   I’m lucky I’ve continued with most of my work (obviously not teaching classes) so I’ve been able to keep busy.  Busy only helps for so long though and whilst to start with being even busier at work probably helped the days go quickly it’s built up to the point of feeling really quite overwhelming in the last couple of weeks.  That’s fine, it happens, I knew that as Social Distancing started to ease I’d end up being under pressure for a while.  Equally knowing stress is coming and so not feeling overwhelmed by it don’t necessarily go hand in hand.   I think there’s a lot of guilt in the current world as well, not intentionally, but a feeling that you should always know there are people worse off than you.  My nan passed away during Lockdown (suspected but not confirmed Covid case) and you find yourself saying well she was old and had underlying health conditions and it’s happened to lots of families, it’s almost like you feel you need to underplay a loss that at any other time you’d acknowledge it for what it is, the loss of a family member.  I think in general I’ve felt ok but overwhelmed with ‘stuff’ in the last couple of weeks.  I wouldn’t say I’ve been depressed or suffering with anxiety (I’ve suffered from both and I know the difference for me in those to what I’ve felt like in Lockdown) but I’m also not loving this and I’m tired and struggling to sleep and restless and in a kind of limbo.

I can imagine that is how lots of people feel right now to be honest.

So that’s why I’ve just not really blogged recently, because some things needed to be dropped to stay sane.  But this week is Mental Health Awareness Week and I felt like that deserved a blog, especially right now, especially in light of what I’ve just shared – right now a lot of people’s mental health are potentially fragile, and a lot of people who have perhaps never struggled before are starting to feel strain.

There is always a theme to Mental Health Awareness Weeks and this time it is Kindness.

I feel like this period has shown lots of incidences of kindness but equally a lot of judgement too.  I’ve seen more posts of Facebook than I’d have like to see judging other people for their actions, their opinions, their geographical location!  There’s been a lack of appreciation that what might seem bearable for those with families, gardens, nice local areas to walk in has probably been quite horrible for those alone, isolated, ill, in tiny flats with no outside space in inner cities.  There’s been at times I think, a lack of ability for people to express things without being jumped on or attacked or a lack of willingness to listen and consider another point of view.

Kindness takes lots of forms.  It of course means showing appreciation to those doing great things, it also means understanding other’s situations, appreciating that those who have views right now that you might think are terrible may have those views for reasons you know nothing about, it means accepting that what might be manageable for you might not be for others and it means being kind to yourself as well as others.  It means sometimes accepting you were wrong, or that you weren’t necessarily wrong but neither was the other person.  Being kind to yourself doesn’t just mean doing nice things like having a bubble bath or a face mask, it can mean cutting yourself some slack, it can mean doing practical things to help improve your mood (for instance for me I always feel better if I’ve trained, especially if I get a run outside, it’s a complete game changer).

It’s so complex because you need to look after yourself but you equally want to look out for others.  I’ve seen quotes about checking in with people during this pandemic and quotes about those around you owing you nothing and of course both are true.  It’s a balancing act, but then it always is and our mental health relies on us taking time for ourselves but actually as we are social creatures at heart it does also rely on us interacting with others- and checking in on others can have as positive impact on your own mental health as having someone check in on you.

I feel like when week’s like this happen it’s so easy to post a meme or a quote when actually these topics are so complex and have so many points of view to them, often contradictory but it’s good that they are covered and that it creates conversations because just raising awareness is a great step in promoting better mental health.

I know this blog has been jumbled and that’s probably a good reflection of how organised my thoughts are at present so I’m not even going to try and tidy it, I’m just going to post it as it is.